Finding a Pack Again
by RubikAshala
Summary: Wander is the daughter of Hircine and after losing her her husband and child wander never wanted a pack again. Even after raising a her adopted son, the thought of it happening again kept her form getting close to anyone like that again. Then she meets Farkas, a wolf like herself. With a little push from her son Ja'al, she decides to take a leap. Farkas/Female Oc


This character is my Head cannon for the first Skyrim character I ever made when I had it for the 360 back in the day. I run on PC now. I don't own Skyrim just like playing in their world. I hope you enjoy this part of my over arching chronicles of the five.

"Fuck...the Silver...Hand...with a...Forsworn Sword...In the ass...and roast them...on...a...spit.", Wander growled out as she limped her way through Whiterun.

They had tried to ambush her on the road back home after visiting her son Ja'al in Winterhold. She thanked her father Hircine that she was far enough away they wouldn't go after him. She had been able to scent them ahead of time and turn into her werewolf form before they attacked but, one of them got in a good hit before she tore him apart. Luckily she had at least one health potion left but it only stopped the bleeding. The silver poison now in her system kept her body from healing and even now, as she round the bend and started to head up the stairs towards the Temple of Kynareth, she could feel it sapping her strength.

With each step up her world tilted and swayed, a darkness fading in around her eyesight. She was only half way up the steps and she had to summon all of the little strength she had left in order to even keep her upright. Come on Wander, your the daughter of Hircine, you can do this! If only the world would stop fucking tilting!

"Wander?"

She had heard that deep growly voice before. She recognized the scent of wolf and steel that clung to his large frame and soft heart. She looked up and squinted through her failing vision.

"Farkas?"she questioned weakly.

And with that, her strength gave out.

The last thing she remembered before darkness took her was Farkas yelling her name and the feel of his big strong arms lifting her up.

When she began to gain consciousness, the first thing she became aware of was laying on her side on a bed. The scent of herbs, incense and medicine was the second thing she became aware of. As her awareness strengthened, she recognized Farkas's scent among the rest. It gave her the strength to slowly open her eyes.

When her sight cleared she saw she was in the Temple of Kynareth and by how the candles were lit, she assumed it was sometime in the late evening. She couldn't remember getting here but, as she became more aware of her surroundings, she could feel bandages wrapped around her middle and the smell of an anti silver salve slowly extracting the poison from her system. Danica would probably have her drink that void awful potion again but if she wanted to heal properly it was a necessary evil.

"Wander?"

Her eyes turned to the source of the gruff voice and found Farkas sitting in a chair next to her bed, a look of worry written clearly on his face. She could tell by the dark circles under his eyes and the stiff way he moved, he must have been there a while. Possibly the whole time she was unconscious. It warmed her heart a bit. Something that didn't happen often, especially when it came to people.

He wasn't wearing the armor he usually wore all the time. Instead he wore a simple shirt with the sleeves rolled up and pair of from fitting trousers. It must have been his off day. Though, wander had to admit, it was a good look for him.

"Hey, Farkas." she replied tiredly.

The relieved smile that came across his face made Wanders heart skip and she smiled tiredly in response.

She wouldn't admit it to anyone but her son that she found Farkas quite attractive. His simple and straightforward nature had been refreshing after years of dealing with false faces and shifty intentions. And the fact that she had a little bit of a thing for big strong men, a bit of a size kink since she was a fairly strong but ultimately short Bosmer, fed a lot into her attraction towards the man.

"I am glad your awake. Danica was worried when I brought you in, Said you had been poisoned. I...", Farkas eyes cast down as he swallowed and wrung his hands, "was worried."

She reached her hand out and weakly laid it on his knee. "I have been in worst scrapes. Though, the poison is a new addition to the 'wolf hunters' arsenal so, watch out for that."

"I will.", Farkas nodded.

"So…. I suppose we are even now. I saved your life, you saved mine?"

"I just brought you to the temple…", Farkas mumbled not looking up.

"And if you hadn't, one of the guards would have mistaken me for a beggar or a passed out drunk and would have take me to the dungeons where I would have succumbed to the poison or I would have been left there to be robbed and shoved in a gutter where I would, again, succumb to the poison.", Wander spoke matter of factually.

"Someone would have helped you."

"Maybe, maybe not. But in my lifetime no one would have willingly helped a stranger passed out in the street."

Wander started to pitch forward and place her hand on the bed in an attempt to sit up. Her muscles screamed and shook with the effort but she was getting restless and way to warm under the blanket that was draped over her.

Farkas spoke with the conviction of a man who saw the good in everyone, "Not everyone is like that."

"I know Farkas. Your not like that. Nor is my son and on occasion the few friends I do have. And I am Grate full for your existence. However, I wont always have you or them around so I have to be realistic when traveling."

There was a small smile on Farkas's face from the compliment to his character but a nod of understanding at what she said.

She could never understand why people thought Farkas was dumb. Sure he may not have a lot of classical knowledge but he had an optimistic wisdom that made up for it. The man was far from stupid. Having a hard time reading and writing does not equal a moron.

Wander groaned as she slowly sat up, the blanket that had been laid over her falling off her aching form. It revealed the wrapping around her chest that kept her above average girls in check and the layers of bandages wrapped around her middle that protected the wound in her side. Without a shirt or chest armor you could see the multiple scars on her skin from both man and beast alike along with several tribal tattoos.

She watched Farkas look her up and down, a hungry look flashing across his eyes for the briefest of seconds before he suddenly found his hands fascinating. She could see a faint blush on his cheeks. She couldn't help but poke him a little.

"See something you like there big guy?"

He didn't reply as he locked eyes with her, but a small smirk turned the corner of his mouth up. The blush remained. She smiled at him mischievously. He returned it with a shy grin before looking down at his hands again and chuckling.

He was agreeing with her statement but being respectful about it.

"You pick on me like the others. I think you would get along with them."

"Is this you trying to hint at me joining the companions?",she asked as she rested her elbows on her knees.

Farkas rubbed the back of his neck with his hand, "...maybe."

She shook her head, chuckling. It had been a fairly smooth move even for him.

This wasn't the first time he had asked her to join. The first time had been after she helped keep him alive during a sliver hand ambush. It had been the first time they met and the first time she had met a fellow wolf who had not succumbed to blood lust.

Nearly everytime they ran into each other he would ask and every time she would say no. At the time she was still part of the thieves guild. But now… even though it was tempting… she was still wary about it.

"I don't know if it is a good idea..."

"Why?"Farkas asked curious.

She thought about how to explain it. She had been born a wolf, lived many centuries hunting in her fathers hunting grounds before she was ripped out and trapped on nirn. She knew the ins and outs of her fathers creation. However, most would never live long enough to ever know some of the more subtle instincts that are present even when one isn't changed. After a few moments she decided to forgo civilities and just be straight about it.

"Aela."

Farkas face twisted in confusion, "I thought you never met Aela in person."

"I haven't. However, she is a member of the circle isn't she?"

Farkas nodded.

"So, she is a female 'wolf' who has been the only female among all males for several years, correct?"

"Yes? But, why does that matter?"

"I will explain it this way. A female wolf who is the only wolf in the pack, has the pick of the males in the pack. The female will get used to this and she may begin to think of the males in the pack as hers and hers alone. Following so far?"

"Yes." Farkas replied as he mimicked her elbows on knees position.

She could see the determination in Farkas's eyes as he absorbed the information she gave him and could practically hear the wheels turning in his brain.

"So, when a new female enters the pack..."

"She will view the newcomer as competition.", Farkas finished for her.

She had a feeling instinct was something he understood.

"Which can cause hostility and even violence between the two females." Wander added.

"She doesn't have any problems with Njada or Ria."

"Are they wolfs though?"

Farkas shook his head.

"Thought so."

"Aela is not like that though."Farkas said defensively.

Wander raised her hands, palms open.

"She may not intend to be, Farkas. But, the wolf in her may force her to. Especially once it recognizes who and what I am. I don't want to cause problems between an already established pack. It benefits no one."

She watched Farkas's pensive expression as he took in what she said. She expected him to get up and leave. Void, she would have if anyone said something like that about Valiant or her own son Ja'al. She looked down, the weight of what she said making her feel as small as a mudcrab. The pause was long and loud.

"Then I will defend you against her."

Wander's head shot up in surprise. She almost thought it a joke by how nonchalantly he said it. Like it was the most logical thing in Nirn to do.

But when she searched his eyes, she saw he was serious.

"But Aela is a member of your pack? Why would you?"

"Your part of my pack too."

Wander sat straight up. A movement her injured side didn't appreciate.

"What?"

The blush deepening on Farkas's face indicated he either hadn't meant to say that out loud or it wasn't meant to be in those words. He looked down at his feet and rubbed the back of his neck as he visibly fought to find the words to explain what he said.

Wander's heart was slamming against her rib cage. Out of fear or excitement she couldn't tell. Probably a little bit of both.

When he looked back up the blush was still there but the look in his eyes signaled he had found the words he had been searching for.

"I mean...you may not be a part of the pack at Jorrvasker, the one that I was given but... Kodlak once told me... 'Blood may be thicker than water but, wont ever be thicker than the bonds you choose for yourself.'"

Was that feeling in her chest her heart breaking or mending? She couldn't tell. But, the burn behind her eyes indicated possible oncoming tears. She bent her head forward and hid her face behind her chestnut brown hair just in case. She would hug the man if it didn't hurt to move. So instead she relented.

"All right, I will...think about it." She sighed.

"Think?"Farkas asked, hope in his voice.

When she glanced up from behind her long hair she could practically see an imaginary tail wagging.

"Yes, ya big softy, I will think about it. I will probably be fussed over by Danica for the next few days so I will have the time."

That happy smile spreading across his face was gonna kill her one day.

It was at that exact moment Danica appeared from the shadows of the darkened temple.

"I would chastise you for moving already but I know it won't do any good."

Her voice broke the moment and both Wander and Farkas turned towards her.

"And you," She pointed at Farkas, "You need to get yourself back to Jorrvasker before your brother tears up Whiterun looking for you."

Wander looked at Farkas, "How long have you been here?"

"Three days. It was how long you had been unconscious and also how long he had been here and in that chair."

Farkas had a guilty look on his face as Wander glared at him, mom mode kicking in.

"Three days? Did you eat?"

"Danica made sure I ate." Farkas said meekly.

"Where did you sleep?"

"The chair."

"What did you tell the others?"

"I didn't. When I left I told them I was gonna go 'hunting'. Which was the original plan. But I ran into you as I was walking towards the gate and...", Farkas shrugged.

Wander rubbed her hands across her face, "You really need to get back. I would imagine if your are gone much longer they are gonna think you got caught by 'wolf hunters'"

Farkas sighed, "Yeah. It would be bad."

Danica walked over and placed her hand on Farkas's shoulder reassuringly but looked at Wander with a knowing look.

"Don't worry Farkas, I will make sure Wander doesn't worsen her injuries by doing anything foolish. She is in good hands."

Wander stuck out her tongue at the healer making Farkas snicker.

"All right. I will get going." Farkas groaned as he stood up out of the chair and stretched. Wander appreciated the muscle as it shook out the tension the chair had built. After he let his arms flop back to his side, he yawned, showing how tired the man truly was.

Before he walked away however he looked at Wander and said, "I hope to see you as a shield sister someday Wander. Get better. Night."

"I will do my best. Night."

She hated to see him go but was loving watching him leave.

Once he closed the door behind him Danica sat in the chair he had previously occupied.

"Shield Sister?" she asked as she handed the antidote to the poison in her system.

The salve helped neutralize the first stage of the poison which drained her strength. The potion cleared the second part of the poison, halting her advanced healing abilities.

"He wants me to join the Companions. Keeps asking every time we run into each other. Before, I was part of...another guild...but not anymore."

With difficulty she opened the bottle and knocked it back all at once. Her face squished up and her tongue came out in a fit of disgust. By the Void it tasted awful.

"I think you should. You are skilled hunter and fighter. You would do well among them."

"Probably. I just... I don't know. A part of me wants to join but..."

Danica began working at removing the bandages to look at the wound. Wander sat still, the little stinging pains as the bandages pulled away from broken skin barely registered in her brain. Danica continued to talk as she worked.

"Your afraid. You have been a lone wolf for so long that having a pack again terrifies you."

Danica always had a way of hitting the nail on the head. She was one of the few who knew what Wander was outside of her friends and son who all shared similar secrets. Of course, Danica finding out was purely by accident when she turned during a particularly painful healing session. She took it in stride surprisingly. It was why she trusted her council.

She was right though. Wander hadn't had a true pack of her own since before she found her son. She had been married once and was on the verge of giving birth when a group like the Silver hand showed up and destroyed everything. She had found Ja'al shortyl after and it had helped her heal but, finding a home like that again... She wasn't sure if she could handle it.

"By that dark look in your eyes I hit it dead on."

"I don't want it to happen again. I don't want anyone in danger because of me."

Her voice was cracking again, the pain and sorrow of the past leaking into her throat.

"Well, look at it this way. Your son Ja'al is fully grown and completely able to take care of himself. Those that you are close to have there own 'hunters' to deal with that have nothing to do with you and if you make friends among the companions...you will be in familiar company, with the same enemies, and more people at your back to fight by your side."

"Familiar company?"Wander raised an eyebrow.

"I may have been eavesdropping and may have figured out your coded speech with Farkas earlier."

"Of course you did."

Danica applied more salve to the rapidly healing wound. By what Wander could see it would take no more than 2-3days before it was healed completely. So at least she wouldn't be bored for to long.

"Besides, you get free room and board, and they pay well. You will have a place to stay until you finish saving up for a place."

Of course she would also want to engage Wander's practical side. Because right now, Wander had no real place of her own to stay. Sure she had been saving up for one but in the mean time she had been either staying at noisy inns or camping outside.

"You just had to be practical about it didn't you?"

Danica chuckled as she began to wrap up her side again.

"Am I Wrong?"

"No. Your not. But, I think I still need to think on it for a while, maybe get a second opinion."

"Ja'al?"

"Ja'al."

Once the wrap was finished Danica lightly tapped it with her palm before getting up.

"Then use my desk and write a letter to your son. You can send it with the courier in the morning."

"Thank you again, Danica."

"Anytime."

Wander walked over to her desk and penned the letter, sending it out with the courier come morning. The next day, while she was reading a book Danica had lent her, a fizzle and a pop opened a small vortex above her book. The small portal spat out a letter than promptly closed again. Wander opened it.

_Hey Mom,_

_ Glad your okay and thanks for the warning about the poison. Maybe you can get Danica to send some of that Antidote my way just in case. Also, I am doing well. I made a friend, his name is J'azrgo and he is a fellow Khajit like me. He is fascinated with the fact I don't speak like he does and we have been experimenting with scrolls and other magics together. He is also pretty cute, so bonus. So, don't worry. I am doing good._

_ So on that note, go do the thing! Go be a companion! If it weren't for you I wouldn't be where I am and as happy as I am so I want you to have the chance to be to. _

_ You never know, maybe that hunky Nord you told me about will let you sink your teeth in him. In all the good ways of course._

_ So, go be a companion, find your pack and tell me about all the shenanigans you get up to. J'zargo likes hearing your stories._

_ Love you._

_ Ja'al_

Wander smiled, folded the letter, put it in her pack with the others she kept and made her decision.

I always head cannoned Farkas as being more emotionally and street intelligent than his brothers book smarts. I never saw Farkas as purely dumb. But I can see him being a big softy though. I hope you enjoy this chapter, next one to come soon...ish. -Rubik


End file.
